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What still resonates with me, however, is how she used very few words to correlate law regulations in India with her fear as a parent. ‘The government doesn’t support your status, how do you expect me to approve?’ she explained calmly. ‘Getting by life as a woman is difficult as is. I can’t imagine how you’d negotiate being a woman and gay in India.’ This was in 2013, when the Supreme Court upheld 377, criminalising homosexual sex. In some ways, it was the best coming-out encounter I could have hoped for—we both cried, she articulated her concerns and listened to mine, and continues to play the denial card ever so often. I’ve made my peace with their unspoken understanding—they haven’t brought up my marriage, and my Indian partner stays over with me at their home frequently, with the bedroom door locked. But this wasn’t the case when I was dating my last girlfriend, after the Balkan. Confiding in my parents felt like a tremendous release, my sexuality was not classified information. .."Anna tuned out Kalliste's description and went back to writing checks. After a bit Kalliste noticed, and came over."What's wrong? Is something bothering you?"Anna stared at the checkbook without really seeing it. "I saw someone today," she said in a low voice, "someone I never expected to see." Oh?" Kalliste sat down, studying Anna's face. "I assume it was an unhappy occasion." It shouldn't have happened." Anna moved the checkbook around the table, rearranged her pens and even adjusted her adding machine slightly. "People tell me I should have been overjoyed." Who was it?" Kalliste asked softly."My... son." Son?" Kalliste hid her reaction well. This was the first she had heard that Anna had a son. "Go on." I gave my son up - when I was younger I made a mistake, and..." Her voice trailed off as she stared at her desk. "This is hard." Nobody will hear it from me."Anna nodded, biting her lip. "I, uh, when I was, uh, when I was 14, barely 14, I had a baby. I thought I could care for.
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